Current art discipline

things I've  tried

Life drawing

................................................................ Bloody hell that was difficult.

film making

.................................................................... All went well until the tea break. They gave me a mug - and it wasn't Earl Grey. Bastards.

pottery

................................................................... Sat at the wheel and had to use two hands - I couldn't even have a fag. And.... my suit had to go to the dry cleaners twice in one week.

sculpture

.................................................................... Sadly I've had to stop due to continuous minor accidents with sharp instruments.

performance art

.................................................................... The Police turned up. Am now doing community service with the 'lads'

photography

..................................................................... F**K - what's all this about focal length?

Basil Basil

STATEMENT

Hi Basil here - sorry to say that at present I am in a fallow period and consequently have produced sod all for the past few months. I have all the materials necessary but it's all one big blank. Am standing here staring at the wall right now.  Hang on!   I feel a stirring - somethings happening!  Am just off to the off licence. Speak soon.  X